Trey Songz has always been a favorite artist of mine, so when he came out with his single, Sex Ain’t Better Than Love, it was no surprise that I fell in love with it right away. It was a bit of a change for him. Granted, the song was still about sex, but this time he was singing about finally realizing the importance of being in love when having sex, and I had to agree, sex without love is really nothing special.
When engaging in sex, you are not only connecting with someone physically but also emotionally, as well as spiritually. Although most people have a hard time admitting or even understanding this. When women have an orgasim, a hormone is released that causes them to form an emotional bond with their sexual partner. I may have made reference to this in my article, Closer Than Most: Friends With Benefits on my other blog, Just Ask Ariel. In the article, I expressed my opinion as to why when you get right down to it, sex really isn’t as casual as people like to treat it. Often times people develop feelings that are not reciprocated, leaving them feeling hurt and rejected. You become tied to this person that you were never supposed to be connected with in a such an intimate way. It only takes a moment for a bond to be formed between you and Mr. or Mrs. Wrong, but often takes months and sometimes even years to break it. As a friend of mine says, we must stop developing permanent feelings for temporary people. One thing I truly believe is that Mr. or Mrs. Right won’t be revealed to you until you have completely broken your chains of bondage from Mr. or Mrs. Right Now.
So, while waiting for my future husband, I have decided to practice celibacy. I no longer desire to be bound to someone who I’m not meant to spend my life with, only to have to start my wait all over again.This is by no means a spur of the moment decision, but one that I have put much thought into. I believe that God’s knows my determination and surprisingly has already placed people in my life that have made the same decision, letting me know that I am not alone in this journey.
Two people I admire, but don’t know personally are sony producer DeVon Franklin and actress Megan Good. They decided refrain from having sex and held each other accountable during their courtship and waited until their wedding night to experience each other the way God intended as man an wife. People questioned whether or not DeVon truly had been celibate for 10 years prior to his marriage, but I for one am not questioning how God rewarded his faithfulness and commitment by blessing him with one of the hottest women in Hollywood as his wife.
With that being said, I can only imagaine how amazing my husband is going to be. Until then, I’ll be waiting, after all, sex ain’t better than love.
While Waiting For You 